I hate Tumblr. It keeps deleting my posts. Here’s the shortened version of what I wrote…

Six Courses

Turkey

18 minutes per pound = about 3.5 hours for a 12 pound turkey

Wash, peel and rough chop 6 stalks of celery, 5 small peeled carrots, 3 medium sized onions. Place on bed of roasting pan.

Remove weird parts like neck and giblets from turkey (keep it if you want to make stock for the gravy). Wash that sucka clean. Pat dry with paper towels and then proceed to tuck the wing tips under the turkey’s butt and the drumsticks in the neck fat cavity. Now, generously brush your turkey with canola oil. About two hours in, cover your turkey with a tin foil shield to protect the turkey’s boobies from drying out (I know, I’m immature). While your doing some shielding, be sure to stir around the vegetables so they don’t burn!

Mashed Potatoes

5 large Russett Potatoes (although red skin or yukon gold is better)

2 Tb spoons of Butter

1/3 cup of buttermilk

Salt to taste

Boil water and put in washed, peeled and quartered potatoes. Boil until the potatoes are soft and tender. Drain the water and mash along with buttermilk and butter. You’re good to go now.

Gravy

Why risk ruining your gravy if you can easily do it with Chicken Gravy from McCormick (No this isn’t an advertisement…it’s just way easier to pour in a cup of cold water with some powder and whisk!)

Classic Green Bean Casserole

3 pkg. (9 oz. each) frozen French-cut green beans, thawed, drained

1 can  (10-3/4 oz.) condensed cream of mushroom soup

1 cup Grated Mild Cheddar Cheese

1/8 tsp.  pepper

1 can (2.8 oz.) French fried onions, divided

PREHEAT oven to 350°F. Mix all ingredients except half can of the onions in 1-1/2-qt. casserole dish.

BAKE 30 min. Top with remaining onions. Bake an additional 5 min.

Corn and Peas

Just read the directions on the back. MAKE SURE YOU GET BIRDS EYE! Not ANY other brand because Birds Eye tastes pretty darn good.

Cornbread Muffins

From the Sweet Corn Muffins recipe on the side of the Albers Yellow Corn Meal box

Makes 18 to 20 muffins

INGREDIENTS:

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2/3 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup yellow corn meal
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/4 cups milk
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
1/3 cup vegetable oil
3 tablespoons butter or margarine, melted

DIRECTIONS:

Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease or paper-line 18 to 20 muffin cups

Combine flour, sugar, corn meal, baking powder and salt in a medium bowl. Combine milk, eggs, vegetable oil and butter in a small bowl; mix well. Add to flour mixture; stir just until blended. Pour into prepared muffin cups filling 2/3 full.

Bake for 18 to 20 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in pans on wire racks for 5 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool slightly. Serve warm.

Blueberry Cheesecake Bars

6 Tbsp. butter, melted2 cups  HONEY MAID Graham Cracker Crumbs2 pkg. (8 oz. each) PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese, softened1/4 cup sugar2 eggs1 tsp.  vanilla1 jar (10 oz.) blueberry jam or preserves1 cup  blueberries

Make It!

HEAT oven to 350ºF.

MIX butter and graham crumbs in 13x9-inch pan; press onto bottom of pan. Refrigerate until ready to use.

BEAT cream cheese in large bowl with mixer until creamy. Add sugar, eggs and vanilla; beat until well blended. Stir jam in jar until softened; spread evenly onto crust. Top with berries, then cream cheese mixture.

BAKE 30 min. or until slightly puffed. Cool completely before cutting into bars.